Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
