I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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