Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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