Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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