she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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