Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
