'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
honey bunches of taint.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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