next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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