yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
