Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Randomize