omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
