Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Yo dont text me then not text me
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
they're like a gay fantastic four
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
