my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
did i just pee glitter
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
