birth control should be required to get into college
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
