his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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