I smell stomach acid.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Randomize
