if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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