How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
