I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Barsexuality is the new black.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
