I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
The beer is more important than you right now.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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