so that wasnt chicken after all
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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