He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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