So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
