I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
