Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
