even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
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