I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
