butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
