Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
