he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
there was a trapeze. enough said
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize