thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
