I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize