we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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