new low.... made out with someone while peeing
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
