Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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