Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
