My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Randomize