I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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