He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
