why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize