Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
babies were throwing up all over the place
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
