youre lurking in front of me
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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