I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
