I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize