he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
