Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
