haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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