how can u be prego again
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
