SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize