i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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