it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
